Monday, January 26, 2009


Is it convinient or cool to be a Stereotype?

Who decides/decided the below(Society)?

- The kind of clothes a man should wear and the way he should
carry himself.
- The kind of clothes a woman should wear and how she should
carry herself.
- Women are meant to be well groomed.
- Women take care of the household and family(yes that is implicit
even in the 21st Century).
- The man must be older than a woman in a relationship(married or
- The man is the head of the family.
- The man should be taller than the woman.
- The man must possess a higher qualification than the woman.
- The woman must look beautiful no matter how ugly the man is.
- The list continues.....

The list is lengthy and exhaustive.

What is it that influences this mindset? How difficult is it to break away from this stereotypical mindset and yet be part of such a society? I am sure it is easier said than done!

What is your take on this?


Anonymous said...

chillllll......i suppossee ur turnnn is nearrrr :-)....thatss yy such beautifull and perplexed thoughtss...i think whtever u just said..alllllzzzz bakvaass...there is nothing like "to be meant" to make or sustain a relationship...... people put up these conditions with a blind eye bcoz they think these are implicit for them in sustaining a relationship to seeek happiness..i dont think one can be happy with his conditionss for happiness intactt.....

Trauma Queen said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Trauma Queen said...


thoo i was so stresed my comment got submitted beofre i culd comment

its thoughts like these that make me wanna bang my head on a wall.. karma trauma rama only - why must you also stress yourself with these bizarre (but rather relevant) thoughts? its my job to be traumatised all the time!!

well either paatis n thaathas decide it, or the collective (un)conscience of people do.

but ya -like the anon commenter above me said - u dont have to take it so seriously.

look at me - all my bf's have been short men. i love short guys - they're so charming!

and if a man is the head of the family, a woman is the neck. the neck controls the head (this was in the movie 'my big fat greek wedding')

Trauma Queen said...

also i think jobless ekta kapoor maamis and mamas who r too stupid and gutless to ASK people out come up with stupid fundas like such to kill time, or to make excuses for not finding mr/miss right

now we all know YOU dont come under THAT category -or do yuo want to?


Karthik said...


what influences this mindset? the thought that men are superior than women, which is in the minds of most men. also, because of a society which has a set of rights and wrongs. also, the inferior thoughts/behaviours of some women. not all women are inferior.

it is very difficult to break away this mindset, but not impossible. it takes a lot ot time. so many men in this world. takes time to change them, even if every one is consiously fighting against this.

women also should take risks to make their parents understand that they are humans and they have their right to make decisions, at least to suggest ideas. parents can validate then.

Shashi said...

I agree with you on almost everything in this post. But I personally feel most women also are victims of the stronger men stereotype. They always seem to like strong men - physically or mentally. You will be forgiven for disagreeing with me :-)

Shashi said...

Blog more often.

Tazeen said...

With female celebrities marrying younger men (Demi Moore/Ashton Kutcher, Ashwarya Rai/Abhishek Bachan, Benazeer Bhutto/Asif Ali Zardari) it may affect some people but the battle is long and drawn out.

As far as ugly men expecting beautiful women, lets just not get there. I can go on and on on that ...

Cynic in Wonderland said...

its years and years of conditioning i guess. and will take many more before it is broken.

ąŝħĭŝħ said...

onty.. lets marry :P

almost all the above stereotypes will be broken if we marry :P

wotsay? :D

Terra Shield said...

It's our lives... if we try to follow what's expected of us, then we'd all go crazy.

I know my parents generation are so "what will people think!!?" and i tell them "to hell with people" We need to be happy!

Julia Scissor said...

Yeah, I'd go with Terra, my bloggerfriend from the dinosaur ages. Too hell with people. They won't come to pick up the pieces if my life was ruined by doing some 'socially acceptable' BS. So why bother?

popsie said...

@Anonymous: Turn is near? Btw I did not make those statements, you seem to be confused. I only asked who are those who decide them and what authority do they have to impose them on all and sundry. Why do most of us follow em blindly?
How easy or difficult is it to break away?

@Trauma Queen: Dot on! :)

@Karthik: Women do take risks and are out there atleast in urban areas. It is not fair to expect women from rural areas to be brave or break the rules given the fact that such thoughts are drilled into them from child hood.

@Shashi: I don't think one should generalise and say "ALL WOMEN like strong men".

Btw the same applies to you. Do blog more often. :)

@Ashish: Gth, BS!

@Tazeen, @Cynic in Wonderland, @Terra Shield, @Julia Scissor: I can't agree more.

Princess Fiona said...

call it stereotype if u want..but i would def want my man to be taller than just makes more sense bedroom wise ;)

Mad said...

These are not sterotypes. These are called Norms.

Sterotypes are like for example "rock stars would be with long hairs, leather clad, smoking drunk guys"
a doctor would be this clean and smart dressed, short haired bespectacled person. can u imagine a male doctor with long hair, leather jacket and rides a harley... difficult right? thats stereotyping

a Norm is not a rule, but people generally follow that. You are free to change it. Would you like a shorter guy as ur bf?

Family head is not just a signatory postion its a huge responsibility. So would you like to take up that position. If you want u can very well do... Go ahead and change the norm

weed-ant said...

One of my friends( a really short guy 4'9" or somthing)was getting to marry a taller and beautiful girl...but stupidly refused saying that girl shoul be shorter than him :) ultimately found one (4'7"). One nice short happy family. He must be thinking of buying land in liliput now lol